Losing Everything
by Mahado
Summary: Kogoro is  missing. Conan tries everything to find him but what if the situation becomes even worse? What will he do when he looses even more beloved people? R
1. Everything is alright

This is my first English FF XD My English grammar is very bad so I asked a great friend of mine to correct it. Thaaaank you raven-of-the-shadows hug

Paring: RanxShinichi/ maybe HeijixKazuha

Rating: T (for violence and character deaths)

I do not own Detective Conan. All characters are the property of Gosho Aoyama

Have fun and R&R please!!

_**Loosing everything by Mahado**_

Chapter 1: "Everything is alright…"

She was still crying. Sitting on the old, grey couch that accented her pale face even more, she noticed nothing around her. Her eyes were filled with tears and despair. They were empty and lifeless. He never saw her like that before. Ran was always happy and filled with joy in life. Of course she cried sometimes, especially because of him. This fool left her alone and always lied to her. This fool only called her on the phone to say, "Hello and goodbye". This fool loved her so much, more than anyone else in this world, but never found the courage to tell her. And even if it was very painful to watch her missing him, it wasn't nearly as bad as now.

She never was so helpless and weak as she was today. He had to do something. Even if he wasn't himself now, and was just a stupid small child with glasses that he didn't need. Everything was a lie.

"Ran-neechan…?" She didn't look up. It was as if she didn't realize that the boy was standing in front of her. Only the sound of sad and muffled sobs filled the room. "Ran-neechan, are you alright?" It was a stupid question. He knew she wasn't. He wasn't alright either.

Finally, she looked up. At first she stared into his eyes, surprised. Then she smiled softly, like she always did. She didn't know how it hurt him to see this 'everything-is-alright-smile'.

"Conan-kun…" she whispered, and tried her best to build up a new mask of happiness. She knew that he already knew it was a fake, but she needed this illusion. But she couldn't fight back new tears. "I'm sorry Conan-kun… I don't want to make you upset, too." The boy shook his head, then he stepped forward, putting his short arms around her neck and finally hugging her. Ran winced for a second or two, but then she hugged him back. Even more tears crossed her already red cheeks. She held the little boy tight to her body and let out a painful scream of sadness and fears. Conan felt her body shaking and caringly petted her back. "It's alright, Ran….I will find him. I promise…" She didn't notice the missing "-neechan" on the end of her name. She didn't notice how adult-like the kid reacted. She was just crying, and she finally drifted of into a deep slumber.

"Soya…Jiisan has been missing the last two days?" Hattori folded his arms and rested his back against a wall. His green eyes observed the grey sky above them. Conan sighed a bit before he answered.

"Yes…"

"And there is no hint where he could be? Maybe he just followed a young sexy woman, and drank a little too much sake?"

"Iee…No." The little boy with the glasses shook his head "He wouldn't worry Ran that much…Even if he is careless he would call her at least. There is something else…I have a bad feeling about this." The tanned detective winced.

"You think…." As always their thoughts overlapped. Conan nodded softly, but seriously.

"Maybe he was kidnapped." Heiji let out a small ironical laugh.

"You´re kidding, Kudo! Why should…?"

"Hattori! This isn't funny. Kogoro is a famous detective who has solved a lot of difficult cases. He has a lot of enemies." The younger boy stopped for a short breather. "Maybe he solved one case too many…" There was a short silence between the two detectives. Heiji felt how fretful his friend was.

"Damn!" Conan dashed his fist against the wall. In some way it was his fault that Kogoro was missing. It was his fault that Ran was crying.

Suddenly he felt a hand on his shoulder and looked up. Heiji had a fake smile on his face. "Come on…Everything will be alright. I'm sure the old man is alive and happy." The smaller boy returned the smile with a weak one. But deep inside his soul, he knew that something terrible happened, and that this was only the beginning of a nightmare which would end in a rude awakening.

To be continued….

Hope you liked it this far…

It would be nice if somebody want to be my second Beta-reader in this way I could update new chapters faster.


	2. Hopeless search

Chapter 2: "Hopeless Search"

Nothing. No hints. No trace. Kogoro was missing for a week now. The police were hopeless. The chance of finding a person alive after such a long time period was very low. And even if he was alive, they couldn't find him. They had no suspects. A motive was easy to find though. It was probably revenge, or someone who hates detectives. There were thousands of possibilities, but possibilities weren't enough. They needed something more. They needed a small hint, a fingerprint, a piece of skin, a bullet, anything. But they had nothing. Absolutely nothing. Inspector Megure let out a deep sigh. This was the first case in his life that he couldn't solve. And even if he believed that Kogoro was dead, he couldn't be sure. He was always present when a crime happened. He wished he could find his partner and friend alive, but was there a ray of light and hope out there somewhere? 

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Conan observed Ran's condition, which became worse with concern. She was still crying every night, but that was the smallest problem. Every time when she heard a noise, she winced and ran to the house door in the silent hope that Kogoro had returned. But he never stood in front of the door. She didn't eat more than she needed to survive. She didn't talk much, even when he called her with his false voice. The only answer was always just her breathing and a small sobbing from time to time. It made him crazy as well. But the only thing he could do was search. He had to find him and bring him back.

Eri, Ran's mother and Kogoro's wife, finally decided to move to the detective agency to live with her daughter. He was sure that wasn't the only reason. Maybe she was just as sad as Ran was, and searched for some comfort too, even when she didn't show her feelings clearly. But Ran's smile didn't return. Sonoko and Kazuha visited the young karate champion too, telling her that everything would be okay. Sometimes they invited her to a café or on a shopping trip, but she never enjoyed it much. Every time a false smile on her lips. But Conan was happy that she was out, just for a little bit. This way, she didn't have to feel Kogoro's absence, and he didn't have to see her endless tears. Seeing her so upset disturbed his concentration.

Now it was 3am, and he was lying on the dark carpet in the second floor of the agency. He checked over all information that he could collect during the week once again. It wasn't much. Kogoro left the house on Monday the 4th July at 6pm. He wanted to play a little bit of mahjong with some friends, but he never arrived there. Some people noticed him on his way. Some young student girls told the police that he gave them an autograph at 6:30pm. After that, he bought some cigarettes in a kiosk at 6:35pm, but that was everything. After 6:40pm, nobody saw him. He disappeared like a ghost in the sunset. Conan checked the whole trace with Hattori, but there was no sign of the detective, no hint, and nothing abnormal. The small boy let out another sigh. How could somebody just disappear? "Conan-kun…?" Conan turned his head around and saw Ran standing in the door. Her face looked even paler, and caused a painful stab in his heart. He forced himself to smile.

"Is something wrong, Ran-neechan?" he asked her with a grin.

"Why are you still awake? Can't you sleep, tiny one?" That was typical for her. She was in pain and was more concerned about others.

"I'm not tired…" he answered. "But you look tired, Ran-neechan. You should sleep a little bit." He added quickly. The brown haired girl shook her head softly.

"I can't…" she whispered. Some fresh tears formed in her eyes. Conan jumped up and gave her a little hug. Ran was emotionless again before she whispered, "Do you think he is still alive? Do you think he will return someday?" The little boy looked into her violet eyes. He didn't know the answer, but he smiled again.

"I am sure he will return to you…" Another lie, but he couldn't tell her the truth.

It was 5am when Ran finally found some rest. She was curled into a tiny ball, and held Conan in her arms like a little teddy bear. The boy couldn't sleep. Carefully, he escaped from Ran's embrace and looked down at the girl. He leaned forward and kissed her forehead. "I'll be back soon!" Silently he left the room. He had to check the whole area again. There had to be something that he didn't notice before. Maybe it was a scratch or a tiny suspicious stone, something that looked so natural that nobody would notice it.

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It was cold on the July morning. Even though it was summer, a cold breeze cooled down the whole city. Conan was shivering a little bit, but he didn't show it, just like always. It was 5:30 now, and only a handful of people were walking on the streets. They were jogging, or just on their way to work. He didn't know why, but suddenly they looked suspicious to him, and his eyes followed their steps. His ears heard every little sound around him. He didn't notice that he had already reached his goal. "Take it easy, Conan. Think. Don't go crazy now!" he said to himself in his mind. Maybe he was just a little bit tired. He hadn't slept for 4 days, and now his body was weaker than he wanted to believe. But there wasn't time for such unimportant things. He had to concentrate and search, find the truth, be a detective. He rubbed his eyes fast and slowly scanned the place. Here, at this exact place, Kogoro disappeared. There had to be a hint. People didn't just disappear. There was no magic in this world, nor ghosts. But still there was nothing. A streetlamp sent out a weak yellow light on the street. 

Conan kneed down. His hands touched the cold and dirty ground below him. "Come on…there had to be something here! Please!" He didn't realize that he was already screaming the words. "For Ran, for your wife, for everybody….please Kogoro give me a hint. There is no perfect crime!" Suddenly, he felt a spark of pain in his heart, he felt something dangerous.

"There is a perfect crime…." That voice. He knew that dark voice. Conan glanced up, and looked into a pair of really cold eyes. Eyes that he had seen before, and whose owner laughed at him in a horrible way. The body of the boy began to tremble. He couldn't do anything against it. The dirty blonde hair covered the left half of the man's face, but his dirty grin was still visible. His black coat blew in the cold breeze.

"Gin…." Conans voice cracked, and the black-clad man grinned even brighter and more horribly. Slowly, he started to walk. There were just some inches between him and the small boy.

"Good morning…Kûdo-kun" he whispered, and threw the thin cigarette that he held in his left hand into a little puddle.

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A little cliff-hanger! XD I hope that you still like this FF and write some comments! Thanx a lot for the comments I already get hug


	3. Painful heartbeat

_**Chapter 3: "Painful Heartbeat"**_

Gin was still smiling at him. Conan's eyes were glued on the black clothed man. He didn't even realize that he was still kneeling on the ground. Gin knew the truth. He knew that he was Shinichi Kûdo, the high school detective. Lying was pointless now. The small boy opened his mouth to say something, but no sound came across his lips. "Are you afraid, Kûdo-kun? Where is your infamous bravery?" The blond man started to smirk, and lit a new cigarette with a silver lighter. The dark smoke banged against the boys face. Conan coughed with squinted eyes. He couldn't breathe anymore, his eyes were burning from the smoke, and his whole body was shaking badly. Gin was right. He didn't want to hear it, but he really was afraid. Not because his life was in danger, not because of the loneliness and helplessness. He was afraid because of his friends. And just now, he realized that he had put them into danger. His fingers nearly bore into the cold and dirty asphalt below him. Another cold breeze touched his skin, and for a few seconds, he was certain he would feel the cold steel of a gun on his forehead.

"Ran…" he thought. Yes, she should be his last thought. Click. "It's over!" Conan bit his lower lip as he awaited the pain that should come.

But there was no pain. There was no blackness and death. Slowly, Conan opened his eyes and scanned the area. Then he gasped. Gin wasn't in front of him anymore. In a silent panic, the boy turned around. Nothing. Nervously he stood up. He had disappeared. Conan felt cold sweat on his cheeks. His body was still trembling. Heavily, he leaned against a wall and observed the sunrise in front of him. The bright orange light of the sun painted the skyscrapers and reflected a warm ray of light on his pale face. The young boy signed and laid his head on the cool stones of the wall. He smiled weakly. "Have I gone crazy?…Was this really just an illusion?" His mind began to spin. Suddenly he felt something bad, something really bad. It was just a feeling, but it forced him to lift his head a little bit. In that same moment, his heart froze. He saw flames. A huge fire, and it came from Professor Agasas' house. It couldn't be! As fast as he could, he crossed the road. To his luck, there weren't many cars on the streets at this early morning time. He felt his legs hurting with every step, but he didn't slow down. He knew that his friend was in danger, and he had to save him, no matter what.

The sound of his steps died away, then the small flame of a cigarette vanished in a puddle of some rainwater. 

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The moon was replaced with the early sunrise, but it was still dark outside. It was 5:30am, but in one room of the house, the light burnt throughout the whole night.  
Ai Haibara, the small 19 year old girl, and ex-black organization member, was sitting on Agasas' expensive armchair and looking over all the data she had collected. She was working on an antidote that reversed the effects of the Apoptoxin 4869, shortened to APTX-4869, but there was still some information missing. "Damn it…" she cursed silently. "Why am I doing this? Working day and night for a pseudo Sherlock Holmes who is so arrogant that he wouldn't even thank me for all this stress…" The young girl rested her head on the desk. In front of her was a picture in a wooden frame. Three of the Detective Boys, Mitsuhiko, Ayumi and Genta were looking very proud and happy in it. The professor was bright, and stupidly smiling while resting his arm on his beloved beetle.

She blinked. She was in this picture too. Next to the professor, she was standing up very straight. On the other side of her stood him, the little boy with the big glasses on his nose, who was grinning playfully. She was the only one who wasn't smiling at all. It was that way because she was never smiling too much anyway. She'd had a bad life, so why should she dare to smile? She lost her sister and her family, and now she was fleeing from the organization, which was hunting after her life and soul.

Suddenly, a strange sound attracted her attention. At first she was irritated, but then she realized that it was just Agasas snoring. It sounded more like a whole sawmill. Ai grinned. Her gaze turned again to the photo on the desk. "Maybe I should smile on the next one?" she thought, softly touching the glass from the frame. "My life isn't that bad now. Is it, Kûdo-kun?" She stretched her body a little bit, and began typing the next line into the computer. She had to repay a debt to Kûdo. Somehow.

Suddenly, she heard another sound. But this one had nothing in common with the snoring from the professor. It was an alarming sound. It was inconspicuous and nearly noiseless, but she recognized it well. It was the sound of growing flames, deathly flames which burnt everything down, whether it was a wooden table, or a human life. The scent of ash was in the air. The brown haired girl stood up and ran to the door from her room, which was in the cellar of the building. She let out a scream when a wall of fire built up in front of her. "What happened?" she thought. "How can a fire spread so fast?"

And than she smelled it. It was the first time in a long time that she had smelled the terrible aroma, the aroma of burning alcohol. She was sure what kind of alcohol it was, and when she looked near her feet, she saw it. A split bottle was on the wooden floor. The shards were scattered everywhere, and it looked like a diamond carpet. A small puddle of a colorless liquid seeped into the wooden floorboard. "Gin…" That was the only thing what Ai could say before she fell to her knees, surrounded by the hot flames.

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Wow! Thank you so much for the comments XD I feel so proud

I hope you enjoyed this chapter too R&R

I like the last sentence from part 1 muhaha sorry ;

Just some information for readers without the Japanese Background:

Persons:

Shinichi Kûdo - Jimmy Kûdo

Ran Mouri - Rachel Moore

Kogoro Mouri - Richard Moore

Hiroshi Agasa - Herschel Agasa

Heiji Hattori - Harley Hartwell

Sonko Suzuki - Serena Sebastian

Ai calls Conan sometimes "Kudo-kun" (his real name, ne?)

_Next chapter_: Agasas house is burning and Conan tries to save him. Will he succeed or….?


	4. Our fault

Chapter 4: "Our fault…"

Dark smoke rose from the roof of Agasa's house. Conan nearly collapsed in front of the building and gasped for breath, but he didn't have time for a break. The life of his friend was in danger. "Hakase! Haibara!" The small boy quickly opened the metallic gate which led to the garden around the house. Luckily it wasn't closed. It was the first time in his life that Conan was thankful for Agasa's careless behaviour.

He ran to the front door and knocked hard against the old wood. "Hakase! Agasa Hakase!" There was no response. He could feel the heat even through the door. The fire had to be spreading very fast. Every minute was important now, but what should he do? In this child's body he lacked the strength to break the door down, and there was no time to find someone who could help him. Suddenly, he knew the answer. "Of course! The Power-kick-boots!" The boy kneeled down and rolled on the tiny wheel on the outside of his special shoes to raise his shooting power. "Here it goes!" he shouted and kicked as hard as he could against the door, which immediately burst into a thousand little pieces. Conan's feet were hurting even more now, but he clenched his teeth. A huge wave of fire crackled into him, and he managed it to fold his arms over his face. Black smoke hung in the air and stole the oxygen. The boy put a handkerchief over his mouth, but his eyes began to water. Quickly, he scanned the room in hope to find the doctor, but he wasn't there. "Hakase! Haibara!" he tired again, but still there was no answer. He went further into the building. The smell of burnt wood and plastic grew more and more, even through the handkerchief. Conan coughed, but he tried to keep his eyes open. Everywhere there was fire, smoke and destruction, but there was no sign of the doctor or Ai. Maybe they were already… No! The boy shook his head rapidly. That couldn't be true. He had to be optimistic now.

Suddenly a small crack caught his attention. His ears tried to detect where it came from. "Downstairs! Haibaras room!" he thought, and ran to the small stairs which lead downwards. Carefully, but as fast as he could, he climbed down. One step after another. When he reached the stairhead, and only a few steps separated him from the brown haired girl's room, a small but sharp pain ached in his left foot. "Shi…." He stomached his curse and looked at the ground where millions of pieces of broken glass were scattered. A small piece of it had bore into his heel. He hobbled a little bit to decrease the small pain, and finally reached Ai's private laboratory. He pushed the door open and looked again into a wall of smoke and ash. The air was so dirty that he couldn't see his own hand in front of him. "Hakase! Haibara…!" This time his voice was weaker. Maybe it was more doubtful. But to his own surprise he heard a weak voice, or more of a whimper. It took him a few seconds, but then he saw her sitting on the ground, head above a lifeless body. The small girl had burrowed her head into the lab coat from the doctor, and didn't realize the boy in front of her till he grabbed her shoulders in a silent panic. "Haibara! Are you alright? Quick! We have to leave! Haibara!"  
Ai looked at him, her eyes were blank, and somehow scary. She was never an optimistic or happy girl, but now she looked really sapped. He hadn't seen her like that before, but he knew that this wasn't the time or moment to be concerned about it. He looked around and found a window behind the desk with the computer. It wasn't big, but it was large enough to free his friends from the poisoned air. He used all his strength to overthrow the desk and open the window in a hurry. Then he piggybacked Ai, and dragged the professor hard over the floor. He knew that the old man was heavy, but now it was like dragging an elephant. It was difficult to forge ahead, and Conan prayed to the gods that the doctor was still alive, because he hadn't the time to feel his pulse.

The small boy didn't feel the hot flames anymore, he didn't feel the pain in his legs. He was just concentrated on his goal. Finally, he climbed out of the window and collapsed on the grass-green ground from Agasa's backyard. The only sound that he heard was the cracking noise of the fire behind him, and the loud siren of the fire brigade. 

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"C…an-…un? Conan-kun?" 

He blinked, and saw into a pair of blue eyes which were watching him with concern. He recognized them immediately. Only one person on this earth could have such beautiful eyes.

"Ran…" he answered, and lifted his head a little bit. It was so heavy, that he felt as if he had stones in it.

"He's awake!" he heard another voice talking. Then he felt a soft grip around his shoulders, which pushed him back into a smooth pillow. Somehow, it was so comfortable that he only wished to lie there, and to feel Ran's tender hands on his skin. But there was something, maybe a thought in the hiddenmost part of his brain that told him that he couldn't relax now. And, at light speed he finally remembered everything. The fire, the smoke, Ai's silent whimper, and Agasa's dead-looking body on the ground.  
"Hakase!" Conan screamed and set up in his bed. "Where is he? Is he alive? What is with Haibara?"

"Shhh…Calm down, Conan-kun…Calm down. They are alive." Rans voice was still weak and sad, but she tried to hide her emotions, like always, to make him feel better. Sonoko was sitting next to her, and smiled in a fake way.  
"Yeah! They are alright… You should rest a little bit, small one. I won't let you worry Ran even more!" Just then, the small boy noticed a mass of plasters which covered his whole body, and a cast over his left arm. The injuries didn't hurt too much, so he just ignored them, and set his feet on the cool hospital floor. "I am okay, Sonoko-neechan!" he said, and grinned softly before he left the room, leaving Ran and Sonoko behind. He knew that something was still wrong. He could see it in Ran's eyes. He heard Sonoko's shrill voice, but he didn't pay attention to it, and walked slowly through the hospital building. He didn't have to search for long until he found the door with the inscription "Haibara" on it. He knocked on the door. "Haibara? Are you awake?" he asked before entering the small white room. But to his surprise, the girl wasn't alone. Ayumi, Genta, and Mistuhiko were sitting next to her bed on some chairs and smiled brightly when they saw the boy enter. 

"Conan-kun!" they shouted in unison, and Ayumi was the first to wrap her arms around his neck.  
"You are awake! That´s so great!" He could see small tears in the girl's eyes, and he had to smile a little bit.  
"I am okay," he said again, "but how is Haibara?" Ayumi's smile faded away, and when Conan looked around, he saw that Genta and Mitsuhiko both had a concerned expression on their faces.  
"She didn't talk..." The young boy with the freckles sighed. "She didn't say a word the whole time…" Conan gulped.

"Where is Hakase Agasa?"  
"In the intensive care," Genta said, lowering his head. "His burns are bad! The doctors don't know if he will…if he will…." The fat boy started to sob, and Ayumi was already crying. Conan was anxious, but he made a good face to a bad situation  
"I'm sure that he will be alright soon! You know Agase. He is a tough one! No crazy experiment could kill him, remember?" The three kids were looking at each other, and thought for a while until they agreed.  
"That's true," Mitsuhiko agreed, and smiled too.  
"Yes! He survived a thousand bad explosions!" Genta added, and shook his head in agreement.  
Finally, Ayumi found her smile again. "Right…"  
Conan grinned again, but suddenly stopped when he heard a voice behind him, and he turned around. Ai was sitting in her bed, and looked coldly into his eyes. Her lips barley moved, but the words she spoke hit Conan's heart like an arrow.

"Our…fault…your fault…That's all meaningless now. We will all die."

To be continued…


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